Oh, Don

Donald Rumsfeld has released a whole bunch of everything, including delightfully bitchy emails, to coincide with the release of his book. Esquire has sifted through some of them, and gives us the following sampling:

The "My Time Is More Valuable Than Yours" Note

- - -
October 26, 200l
TO: Honorable Condoleezza Rice
FROM: Donald Rumsfeld
SUBJECT: Schedule

It isn't possible to have a 7:15 a.m. phone call, an NSC meeting and then two PC meetings in one day. That takes most of the day.

I need time with my staff. Let's try to figure out a different way to do our business…

The "Do You Think You're On Entourage?!" Note

- - -
December 13, 200l
TO: Honorable Condoleezza Rice
FROM: Donald Rumsfeld
SUBJECT: PC Meeting

We just had the Principals Committee meeting on Iran and Russia. At the last minute, we were told not to bring the “plus one.” I arrive, and I see you have Steve Hadley, Bob Joseph, Robin Cleveland, and Al Gonzales there-and I am like a one-armed paperhanger.

I am going to start bringing “plus one” to my meetings at the White House, unless there is just an enormously good reason not to. I sure cannot imagine what it would have been on that meeting, particularly since there were so many people in the room anyway…

The "You're Terrible At Your Job And You Can't Even Explain Why, Dumbass" Note

- - -
May 20, 2002
TO: Honorable Condoleezza Rice
FROM: Donald Rumsfeld
SUBJECT: Moscow Proposals

I just saw this article from the London Times saying, “President Bush will propose . . . that Russia and the United States join forces to develop the controversial Star Wars missile defense system . . .”

What is that about?

Second, I have asked repeatedly for a copy of these other documents that are supposedly going to be dealt with by President Putin and President Bush in Moscow. I still haven't seen a copy of anything other than the treaty. I need to see them. Please get them over to me.

Thank you.

The "She's Either Dumb, Deaf, or Secretly British, and Therefore, an Obtuse Asshole" Note

- - -
August 22, 2002
TO: Paul Wolfowitz [Deputy Secretary of Defense]
FROM: Donald Rumsfeld
SUBJECT:

Call Condi Rice. She said to me that we have got to get the detainee mess sorted out, that nobody is able to get answers. I think she is getting this from the UK. Call her and find out what she is talking about. She always comes in with these cryptic messages as thought [sic] the Pentagon is messed up, and I don't have any idea what she is talking about…

The "You're Such an Idiot You Can't Even Run a Schedule" Note

- - -
October 4, 2002
TO: Honorable Condoleezza Rice
FROM: Donald Rumsfeld
SUBJECT: North Korea

I thought you told the President in my meeting that there werent going to be any meals at the North Korean event. I notice they had one or two dinners.

Thanks.

The "How I Subvert Your Time-Sucking Meetings" Note

- - -
October 30, 2003
TO: Honorable Condoleezza Rice
FROM: Donald Rumsfeld
SUBJECT: NSC Meetings

We have an NSC meeting scheduled for Monday with no subject. I like to be prepared for meetings, but if we don't have the subject of the meeting a working day ahead of time, then there is no way for us to be prepared…

The "You're Not Early Enough For Us, Slackass" Note

- - -
November 5, 2003
TO: Honorable Condoleezza Rice
FROM: Donald Rumsfeld
SUBJECT: Agendas and Schedules for PC and NSC Meetings

…If you want people from DoD to do something, please tell us that, not in the meeting, but the day before—and we will do our best…

The "And By Tactical Errors She Means 'My Bad Hair Days'" Note

- - -
April 04, 2006
TO: Stephen J Hadley [National Security Advisor]
FROM: Donald Rumsfeld

I think we better get some talking points on what Condi thinks she meant when she said we have made "thousands of tactical errors."

I keep getting asked the question, and I don't know the answer. I don't know what she had in mind.

Thanks.

Fun Graph

Rate of job loss in Bush & Obama administrations.

Only the 36th Worst!

Iranian President Pretends He'll Meet with US

In a speech given at the 30th anniversary of the Iranian Revolution, the Iranian president claimed he would meet with the US if "fundamental changes" were made in US policy. He also included this: "The world does not want the dark era of [George Bush] to be repeated. . . . If some people seek to repeat that experience... they should know they will face a much worse fate that Bush's." Um, so yeah, no one liked Bush, but to that little threat, I say, SUCK IT, AHMADINEJACRAZY. What an irritating pipsqueak. (BBC)

Eight Years. Two Minutes.

Bush's presidency in 2 minutes and change.

Bush on Torture

Brit Hume interviews our lame duck, who gives that hateful, irritating smirk while talking about authorizing the torture of Khalid Sheikh Mohammed (whom he refers to as Kah-Lake...I think that's wrong.)

Conflicted Thoughts on Torture

Ross Douthat on the complex emotions and thoughts people have about US "enhanced interrogation techniques." It is a piece that verbalizes the "inarticulate mix of anger, uncertainty, and guilt about the Bush administration's interrogation policy."

Nice Reflexes, Mr. President

Priceless: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8GOrc0-Ygg&eurl=http://wonkette.com/&feature=player_embedded

Reminiscing with George

Here is the full transcript of the Charlie Gibson interview with Bush (and wife). Whereas Sarah Palin seems even more ridiculous and out of her league in print (a fairly spectacular feat), President Bush sounds more coherent when you read his words in your own voice instead of listening to his smarmy hehe voice. Reading the transcript, he comes across sounding kind of sad and tired--I don't know if that's what he sounded like in person.

A few snippets:

***
GIBSON: What were you most unprepared for?

BUSH: Well, I think I was unprepared for war. In other words, I didn't campaign and say, "Please vote for me, I'll be able to handle an attack." In other words, I didn't anticipate war. Presidents -- one of the things about the modern presidency is that the unexpected will happen.

****

Rachael: OK, I know anticipating the exact specifics of the war on terror would be hard to do, but almost every president has presided over armed conflict ranging from the relatively small to devastingly massive. Is it so hard to expect that our President might have anticipated some sort of conflict situation?

****

GIBSON: Was the election in any way a repudiation of the Bush administration?

BUSH: I think it was a repudiation of Republicans. And I'm sure some people voted for Barack Obama because of me. I think most people voted for Barack Obama because they decided they wanted him to be in their living room for the next four years explaining policy. In other words, they made a conscious choice to put him in as President.

****

Rachael: His answer is remarkably coherent.

****

GIBSON: But both candidates wound up criticizing you a lot.

BUSH: Yes, well, that's what happens when you're the incumbent during a tough economic time, but --

GIBSON: Hurt?

BUSH: No, not really. You know, I've been around politics a long time. Remember, I was the guy in 2000 who campaigned for change. I campaigned for change when I ran for governor of Texas. The only time I really didn't campaign for change is when I was running for reelection.

****

Rachael: Well, things certainly did change with you at the helm. Changed right into the crapper.

****

GIBSON: If the intelligence had been right, would there have been an Iraq war?

BUSH: Yes, because Saddam Hussein was unwilling to let the inspectors go in to determine whether or not the U.N. resolutions were being upheld. In other words, if he had had weapons of mass destruction, would there have been a war? Absolutely.

GIBSON: No, if you had known he didn't.

BUSH: Oh, I see what you're saying. You know, that's an interesting question. That is a do-over that I can't do. It's hard for me to speculate.

GIBSON: Greatest accomplishment? The one thing you're proudest of?

BUSH: I keep recognizing we're in a war against ideological thugs and keeping America safe.

****

Rachael: Charlie! How did you let that one go? "It's hard for me to speculate," and you just move on to the greatest accomplishment? (An accomplishment that really leaves something to be desired.) He should have asked another follow-up.

Looking Back

W. is delusional. He hopes to be remembered as a "liberator of the Iraqi people," among other things. He also maintains that he came into the White House with a certain set of "values" and that he didn't abandon those values. That's probably true. Some of his values are just kind of despicable, so being proud of having stayed true to them is not really that impressive. Don't let the door hit your hiney on the way out, Mr. President.